hello motivation

I dont know what happened and when but finally I am back on trackI hello motivation, don't think I have seen you since, umm freshman year.  I think that too often in live we as humans become complacent, fine with little standards and light expectations.  And if this is not enough in itself, ill prioritizing does not help the matter any.  SO needless to say, for too long now I have been off track, allowing myself to be alright with normal and nothing exceeding.

I can recall the time my sophomore year of college and ironically enough my sophomore year of high school, where I just became disengaged. This last time I attribute it to mental exhaustion.  For whatever reason, it may have been that the work became too much, or my relationship was lacking or very much that I was missing something within myself, but I very much remember sort of just giving up.  Aware of the consequences of course, somehow the moment became all I was living for, and truth is those single moments were nothing to brag about in themselves.  And so I allowed myself to stay in that mindset, finding trivial things to make up for meaningful goals.  Similarly in 10th grade I allowed this to happen to myself, where then too, school work became a back burner to unimportant "at the moment" goals.  And finally I come across a moment, now, like I did then, that brought me back to the me that I am supposed to be.  I am far too driven of an individual with capability of far too much to waste a moment being fine with the mundane.

When I sit in the library on a Friday night even though I long for a nap and to be hanging with the besties, I realize that I am back on track.  It did take me a while to get here and I'm not sure why, but things have a way of working out as they should.  After a talk today with Professor Washington and networking opportunities coming at me from left and right, I have faith in the future again.  And this time it doesn't seem too distant and overtly abstract to pay attention to.  Hello Motivation, goodbye slacker.